Not gonna lie, I wanted the title to say “How To Deal With Jerks” or “How To Deal With A-Holes,” but that just wouldn’t be nice now would it? We all have at least one who absolutely grates on our nerves. I recently did a call for my team to give a few tips that have helped me over the years. Lord knows we women can get into some stupid cattiness! Did I say that?
Let’s keep it simple. Here are my list of 5 things you should know.
1. If someone wrongs you, DO NOT react with words or actions right away. The worst thing you can do is start texting your thoughts or feelings when in anger.
Calm down! Think the situation though. Even if you are in the right (and I am sure you are) what good will come of you reacting in anger? You will say things would wouldn’t normally say face to face, you escalate the situation and in the event of a text or email, you now have evidence against you. Trust me, your words can and will be twisted if you type it all out and hit send.
Reread your message and have someone calm read your message. Does it need to be sent? Would it offend you if it came to you? Delete it if it will cause trouble- YOU KNOW IT WILL! I have often showed messages to my husband before sending and he would say “no way! Don’t send that!” I am so thankful because he is usually right about that kind of thing.
2. Hurt People Hurt People. Realize that when people lash out against you, it is often because they have been hurt. I almost always consider the source and what they have going on in their life and try to see it from their perspective. It really isn’t about YOU and if it is, you need to be big enough to apologize.
3. There is power in forgiveness. Even if you are the one that has been wronged (and I am sure you were). Forgiving the other person involved breaks down walls, brings peace, allows healing and brings clarity. You only have the power to control YOU.
4. Don’t believe everything you hear. Practice WISDOM. Assume the best in everyone. When you find yourself in the middle of gossip, try to change the subject. Know that you are only hearing one side of the story. Be the BIGGER person.
5. Act in such a way that when people speak wrongly against you, no one will believe them. I take note right away when someone is constantly talking badly about others. I have no doubt they are doing it to me also when I am not around. Why? Because hurt people hurt people.
If you are that sweet person who always smiles and never has a negative word to say about others, I am not going to believe it when someone tells me something harsh about you. I know it does not fit your character.
Negative and hurtful people will always cross our paths. You can’t change them. You can only control your actions. Falling prey to these people is so dangerous to our success and well being. It will pull us down and bring out the worst in us. Reacting in LOVE will always bring a sense of peace to you and eventually to the situation.
- spend time in prayer and reflection
- make time for personal development
- decrease the about of contact you have with negative people
- forgive yourself and others
- you have to let go and move on or it will eat you up inside and affect your performance.
Love really does conquer all. Do the right thing even if it takes every fiber of your being to do so. It will come back to you.